The quest to trust myself, others and the universe.

Someone I admire deeply told me to start a meditation practice and to take it very, very seriously.

Sometimes we are anxious for the future because of many things; shame, doubt, fear. In my particular case, I lack trust.

To strengthen my self worth, exploring the world of meditation, spiritual healing and yoga is what I’m motivated to do to help better listen to my inner voice.

Trust requires us to believe in the moment. Today I choose to embark on this journey to ultimately learn how to trust that I, alone have what it takes to manifest the life I long for.

With the law of attraction, we find ourselves vibrating at like-minded frequencies. It takes for us to change our internal narrative, to start the shift to a positive dialogue within ourselves in order to attract the things we want.

Learn to love and trust yourself and the rest will come. Have a listen to Christine Hassler’s Over It And On With It podcast if you want to get started with personal development.

Here’s to my journey! 

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A concert never ceases to amaze me.

If you know me, you know that I love Green Day. They are the band I’ve followed since I was 12. 


Growing up I used to get teased a lot because I started liking them when they hit mainstream status with their rock-pop opera album, American Idiot; their most popular album and arguably the album that killed their musical career because they would never be able match the same success. That is a very subjective statement of course (and not one I’m prepared to say I agree with)….

Well, to my haters here’s what I have to tell you. It’s been 12 years of steady introduction to all 12 (old and new) Green Day albums and I’ve loved every second of it! Including not missing a single Toronto tour since their American Idiot kickoff in the summer of 2006 at Molson Park.

Apart from my useless bragging rights, the point I want to make today is that there is something INCREDIBLY special about having a favourite artist to obsess over throughout your adolescent years.

The individual side of music.

This is the most important piece of it all. It’s the discovery and the part where you fall in love. It is when you listen and study the music. The melodies become part of your daily routine and the lyrics speak to your life and to your purpose.

This is precisely when you relish in getting to know your artists on a personal level and let the music speak to your soul.

I spent countless hours researching Billie, Mike and Tre. Who they are as people, how they got introduced to music and what influences them and inspires their writing. 

The best part about memorizing and overplaying songs is that even the slightest hint of the that opening riff is able to strike up your memory and bring you back to a nostalgic place.

The concert and community

I will never forget the first time I saw Green Day play live and I don’t know what got to me more; the fact that they were right in front of me playing their songs live, or the fact that I got to be with that many people who loved them just as much as I did and experience the music together in a place of mutual feeling. Suddenly no one feels like a stranger. 

I say this as I settle back at home after seeing them live for a second time this year in 2017 (RevRad Tour, Budweiser Stage).

A concert never ceases to amaze me because of the powerful elated state it is able to put you in. And because of the amazing connections you make with those around you.

As Billie screams out to us at each show, the concert is a celebration. There is no hate. We sing together, we dance together, and we cry together.

Music is a language, no doubt. It is able to connect different cultures, genders, sexulaties and neutralize the space. It is able to connect us on a human level, to feel the power and magnitude of 30,000 souls crowded around you embracing in the same moment and the same rhythms. Just so powerful.

It’s no wonder why we often can’t give verbal language to this feeling.

It is beautiful, and it makes me fall back in love with the human race…if only for an hour. 

Who is the artist that rocks your world? 

What to expect the first time you take Melatonin

I have always been a great sleeper.  The girl that’s known to fall asleep after suggesting to watch a movie. Or the first one to pass out at a girls night. That’s basically me.

A few weeks ago, I adopted a beautiful 2-year old cat. If you’re thinking about getting a cat, you’ll want to check out my post, Getting a cat for the first time? Here’s what to consider.

Luna (my cat!) is awesome, and I love her so much but she’s still adjusting and is naturally just super talkative. Especially during the night which is NOT very fun when you live in a studio apartment with no doors to shut out the noise.

Needless to say, I am a wee bit sleep deprived.

Last week I decided to look up ways to improve sleep and one of the first Google search results I came across was taking a melatonin supplement.  I am not the fondest of taking supplements, even natural ones. But melatonin is one of those things that you hear about so commonly being used. And it was on sale at Rexall…so OBVIOUSLY it was a sign for me to buy it, right?

After sifting through all kinds of reviews online, I took a 10mg pill of melatonin for the first time just an hour before bed. A lot of people take between 3mg and 5mg, so 10mg definitely seemed like a lot. But regardless, that’s what I had. So I turned on an episode of Gilmore Girls and sat there waiting for the melatonin trip to set in.

I fell asleep 15 minutes into the show. That’s not any more or less different than me usual falling asleep time and I didn’t feel any noticeable difference before dosing off.  But…

Here’s the run-down of my melatonin experience after about 7 days of use, 1-2 hours before bed:

  • I don’t notice an obvious difference in falling asleep any faster than I had before
  • I have found a slight improvement in my sleep quality
  • I have found that throughout the course of taking 10mg, I am staying asleep in longer waves throughout the night
  • Downfall: I am a bit groggier in the morning. But that’s nothing a cup of coffee can’t fix.

One of the things that really freaked me out was that a lot of people mentioned having really vivid dreams? I haven’t experienced those, and hopefully I never will.

All in all, if you’re thinking about trying melatonin and you’re worried. Don’t be. I know everyone is different, but I tried it and the effects seem minimal.

Getting a cat for the first time? Here’s what you’ll want to consider.

1. Cats are nocturnal.

Expect that your new furbaby will be awake. At night.

I guess I sort of intuitively knew this all along but for whatever reason it didn’t really click in for me until she was in my place staring at me, meowing from my bed’s headboard at 3 in the fucking morning.

Now, Luna is still adjusting to her surroundings, but I feel like some of these habits that she has are just hers for life.

Here’s her nighttime schedule (and mine, now):

  • 11PM – The “Witching Hour”
    She literally DOES NOT stop bouncing off the walls and playing with her toys. Kind of cute at 11PM.
  • 11PM – 2:59AM – The Cuddle Sesh
    Once she settles from her playtime, she gets sort of tired and comes to chill with me on my bed. This is the best part of the night and the most amount of sleep I get.
  • 3AM – The “I’m WIDE Awake” Moment!
    She wakes up every morning at 3AM and starts fucking shit up to remind me she’s nocturnal and we live in a small space together. This goes on/off for about 30 minutes.
  • 3:30AM – 4:59AM – The “Ok fineeee, I’ll chill human” Part
    She gives up her recklessness and decides to either sleep with me again or perch herself by the window.
  • 5AM – The “MEOW FEST FOR ATTENTION!” Sesh
    She does not stop fucking meowing for like 15-30 minutes until I get her attention and pet her.
  • 5AM – 6:44AM – The “Calm Before The Storm”.
    She’s calm and relaxed, letting me get some rest before another day.
  • 6:45AM – The “GET UP AND FEED ME YOU BITCH” Feeding Time
    Chaos begins as my alarm goes off for the morning. Even if I hit snooze, I will be reminded that she’s hungry and in need of food.

2. You’re sharing your place.

Your living space doesn’t need to be huge, but it will need to accommodate your cat.

Here’s what you need to think of planning for:

  • A bed
  • Food bowls
  • Toys
  • A scratch post
  • A regular sized litter box
  • Food & litter storage
  • and more TOYS!

I was worried that my place was too small. I live in a tiny but perfect-for-me studio in a condo. Once I started fitting in all of these things, my perfect-for-me studio that was once tidy and organized became full and cluttered. I found ways to minimize the clutter by planning and storing things smartly. My biggest saving grace is my litter box. This thing matches my furniture, feels like a usable piece of furniture. And helps keep in the sand. Check out some of these awesome litter box enclosure solutions!

3. You need to be home more.

I used to go out a lot. Patios, friend’s houses, boyfriend’s. Make sure you make time for your kitty. She’s an independent woman, but she still needs your time and affection.

4. You need a set of Godparents.

You’re likely going to be away from time to time. If it’s over a night or two, you’re going to need a backup to come and feed and love your kitty. Make sure you have an extra set of keys and people you trust that will actually come and be there for her.

5. Admit it. You’re allergic.

If you’re allergic to cats. I’m here to tell you, you’re going to be allergic to your dream cat. I am allergic to cats and heard I would become immune if I stick it out long enough as allergies can fade if you give yourself small doses of the allergen. Well, it’s been a month and I’m still allergic. Be prepared to take meds.

6. It’ll get messy.

Between mopping up hair to cleaning up broken glass due to the Witching Hour, you’re destined to pull a Danny Tanner at all hours of the day and night.

I’m an OCD clean freak. So now I sweep my place twice every day. And vacuum every 3 days. I have to otherwise I’ll die from my allergies! Not actually, but hair collects QUICKLY. And litter is my demise. I always thought I could keep that shit tidy, but the inevitable truth is, the gritty sand becomes one with your soul.  Embrace it. You’re a cat lady. Or CatMan.

7. You can do this.

It’s not a lot of work, but it’s still going to be more work than you’re used to. But the reality is, there is nothing sweeter than coming home to something that honestly loves you. Even if it has a very strange way of showing it.

So here’s the (litter poop) scoop. If you’re considering to adopt, you should. You have what it takes to give your kitty a loving home. What the hell are you waiting for? Get the cat already!

My first ever post.

Today I start my blog.  I say that so nonchalantly because I always knew this day would come. I always knew I would start it. But I didn’t know when. Kind of like that little unborn child you have imagined in your head? Or the feeling everyone tells you about meeting “The One”? Well, today I just knew.

Welcome to my blog.

As a digital marketer by trade, a lot of preliminary thought goes into building requirements and objectives before starting any new development. So naturally, this model has made its way to my personal life and it shapes my perspective. I find myself constantly questioning the purpose of…well, everything! But mostly I question the purpose of my actions. Or the purpose of my reactions (those are always fun if you’re into pshycoanalysis). And the purpose of everyone else’s actions and reactions. I questioned the purpose of this blog, my blog. Why I wanted to start it, why now suddenly felt like the right time to begin, and what value do I want to bring to my audience. My answer is this.

Gratitude.

My life is not fabricated. It is not intentional. All I have to offer you is my experiences.

My blog is a tribute not only to my life, but to life itself. The life I’ve been so graciously given and the similar lifestyle (note: I use similar, not “the same”) experienced by you. And neither is this blog. It does not owe or expect to receive anything from anyone.

Let these posts be the window to my mind and my heart. I hope they extend to you the same way my thoughts allow me to transcend metaphysically. I hope these narratives inspire you to be brave, to be more authentically true to yourself. And I hope you open yourself up to vulnerability and to love.

 

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